Apparently working in a vet clinic for the better part of 5 years is precisely the recipe required to inure one to the effects of Palahniuk's writing. And that's what Palahniuk does best: he writes about the dark sides of people and how precious little it takes to make those sides surface. All the blood-and-guts and bodily fluids in the world don't really gross me out. You'll see tons of "OMG SO GWOSS!!" reviews here, but this ain't one of 'em. Update : the hurl has now been performed, and Chuck Palahnik's Haunted sailed in a graceful arc then smashed against the wall, its guts spilled out and several rodents started gnawing them.oh shut up.Īpparently working in a vet clinic for the better part of 5 years is precisely the recipe required to inure one to the effects of Palahniuk's writing. Not! Ha-ha! ROTFLMAO!! Only in the world of Chuck, this would be ROTFLMPO - that's right, Roll On The Floor Laughing My Penis Off! Ha ha! Why? Because it's gross, and it isn't that funny! I find myself bleeding profusely from the extreme cutting edge qualities of this book every time I pick it up. Prior to this chapter you get a spoof all about television and advertising. Is it supposed to be stupid? Because if so, it really is. So : is this supposed to be amusing? Because if so, it really isn't. You get the picture - how could you not - it's the same joke repeated over and over again, a joke which Tom Wolfe was cracking in 1975 (black is the new black, with variations). "Social divers, Inky says, are the new social climbers." (p71) "Poverty, Inky says, is the new wealth." (p71) "Inky always said being absent is the new being present." (p 69) What is it supposed to be? Does this guy really think these lame parodies are funny? This is from the section called "Slumming", which is about rich people, a couple of whom are pretending to be poor : What is it supposed to be? Does this guy really think these lame parodies are funny? This is from the section called "Slumming", which is about rich people, a couple of whom are pretending to be poor : "Inky always said being absent is the new being present." (p 69) "Poverty, Inky says, is the new wealth." (p71) "Social divers, Inky says, are the new social climbers." (p71) "Nobodies are the new celebrity." (p72) "Public is the new I'm only on p 75 of this thing and I'm about to hurl it at the wall. I'm only on p 75 of this thing and I'm about to hurl it at the wall. And the more desperate the circumstances become, the more desperate the stories they tell - and the more devious their machinations to make themselves the hero of the inevitable play/movie/non-fiction blockbuster that will certainly be made from their plight.more They are led to believe that here they will leave behind all the distractions of 'real life' that are keeping them from creating the masterpiece that is in them.īut 'here' turns out to be a cavernous and ornate old theater where they are utterly isolated from the outside world - and where heat and power and, most importantly, food are in increasingly short supply. The stories are told by people who have all answered an ad headlined ' Artists Retreat: Abandon your life for three months'. They are led to believe that here they will leave behind all the distractions of 'real life' that are kee Haunted is a novel made up of stories: twenty-three of the most horrifying, hilarious, mind-blowing, stomach-churning tales you'll ever encounter. Haunted is a novel made up of stories: twenty-three of the most horrifying, hilarious, mind-blowing, stomach-churning tales you'll ever encounter.